Episode 16 – Mental Health

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Hi everyone, its Tannaz Hosseinpour and Welcome to a new episode of Minutes on Growth. Last week was mental health awareness week in the United Kingdom and I thought that I would dedicate this episode to mental health. When we break our arm, the majority of us won’t think twice about going to the hospital and getting an Xray or when we catch a cold we might go see a doctor, or we might immediately incorporate more vitamin C fruits and herbal teas into our diet. The point is that with physical health we take action. Most of the times it is an immediate action, but the same can’t be said about mental health. Having good mental health impacts the quality of your life. When you go through a period of poor mental health, you might find the ways you’re frequently thinking, feeling or reacting become difficult or even impossible to cope with.  While I am so pleased that many countries and organizations are incorporating mental health awareness week into their agendas, a lot of work still needs to be done. We need to address the stigma around mental health and remove it as a taboo subject in our society. The only way we can do so is by talking about it and raising awareness. I mean, I have been to countries where there are still people who think that you should only see a therapist if you are crazy, and societies that dismiss anxiety and depression as real issues. My parents got separated when I was a teenager, and because they had a civil break up I never thought that I was impacted by it. A couple of months after their separation, I headed to a new country to commence my undergraduate studies. I started drinking heavily and one weekend I ended up passing out. I woke up in the hospital feeling terrified and alone. My university had a policy for underage drinking which stated that in the event where an incident occurs where the ER is involved, the student must complete 2 therapy sessions. During the first session, I realized that I had unresolved issues inside myself. I found out that there was anger and pain within me. I didn’t quite comprehend where the root of my issues lied. I always thought that I had a normal upbringing, and my parents were both relatively active in my childhood, so I wondered why I felt the way that I did. once my mandatory sessions finished, I started to look for a therapist that I felt comfortable with and started therapy. its been almost a decade since and I still have a therapist that I communicate with when life feels dark and I need some light, insight and inspiration.

There are so many different types of mental health problems out there such as depression, anxiety and panic attacks, anger, phobias, eating disorders, borderline personality disorder, schizophrenia, obsessive-compulsive disorder, Post traumatic stress disorder, paranoia, bipolar disorder, sleep problems, stress, self-esteem, self harm, and many more. Some of these have similar symptoms so you may experience the symptoms of more than one mental health problem or be given several diagnoses at once, or you might not have any particular diagnosis but still be finding things very difficult. everyone’s experience is different and can change at different times. It is important for us to talk about them, to feel comfortable addressing them, and most importantly to be kind and patient with ourselves as we figure it out. There are ways for us to help ourselves as well. For example, by staying aware of your mental health, nourishing your social life, trying out peer support, making time for the therapeutic activities, looking after your physical health and even contacting specialist organizations. Moreover, there are many treatments available such as talking treatments, cognitive behavioral therapy, Arts and creative therapies, complementary and alternative therapies, and even medication.

I just wanted to give a few examples of how to self-care when facing different problems. With depression, you can try to talk to someone you trust, or try peer support. Peer supports brings together people who have had similar experiences to support each other and many have found that it helps them share ideas about how to stay well, connect with others and feel less alone. You can also try mindfulness and meditation, look after your physical health ( which includes getting good sleep, having a good diet, looking after your hygiene, doing some physical activity and avoiding recreational substance use). It can also be useful to keep a mood diary so that you can track any changes in your mood and  notice if any activities places or people make you feel better or worse. You can also try to spend time in nature, many have found that some time away from the hustle and bustle of everyday life can be calming. Looking after yourself and doing things that you enjoy can help support your recovery and improve the quality of your life. For those suffering from anxiety all the above work too and you can incorporate breathing exercises into your daily lives. Take time to inhale and always remember to breathe. It’s the simplest thing but we tend to forget it in panic attacks. If you are having trouble sleeping at night as a result of anxiety, depression, or stress, you can take action by giving yourself some tech free time before bedtime, by establishing a routine where for example you only enter your bed when you’re feeling tired and waking up at a specific time, or by doing something calming such as listening to relaxing music, having a bath, doing breathing exercises, muscle relaxation, visualization, or meditation at Night. If you are unable to go to therapy, there are many wonderful organizations out there that provide Materials on these issues. I obtained most of this information from Mind Organization UK. There are also many Community groups that you can join, or if you tight on time , there are many social media accounts led by certified life coaches, spiritual teachers, and psychologists that offer valuable advice on their platforms.

Do not worry. You are not alone. Mental health problems are a common human experience. They can happen all kinds of people from all walks of life. And it’s likely that when you find a combination of self-care, treatment, and support that works for you, you will get better.

Thank you for listening, talk to you soon.

Love & Light, Tannaz Hosseinpour

Episode 15 – Accountability and Consistency

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Hi Everyone,

This is Tannaz Hosseinpour and welcome back to Minutes on Growth.The last time I recorded, I mentioned that due to personal reasons, I had taken a break from recording. I thought that my writing could take a break until all my life problems had disappeared. Well, today marks 8 months since that decision, and I am pleased to announce that not much has changed since in regards to my circumstances and that my decision was the wrong one. In fact, life even got crazier. My partner got sick, I lost my grand father and then I got sick. It seems as if, every single time I want to get life back to quote on quote “how it was”, it not only doesn’t happen but more events turn to unfold as well. Which made me realize that we will never reach a point in our lives where we can completely control the outside forces. We can however control how we feel about them and how we treat them on the inside. Waiting for the perfect moment is a waste of time and can in fact lead to anxiety. We’re constantly looking forward to tomorrow, the next week, the future. We fail to actually live in the moment, the present moment. We end up putting off our worries, but just like how it was when we were in school, you can put off studying for that exam, but you’re eventually going to have to study for it the night before, which only creates more stress and anxiety. So why not live it as it happens, why not live life as it occurs. But easier said than done right? How can I be okay on the inside when I lose a loved one? I realized that it is not necessarily about being okay but there are two factors that one should never forget in life: accountability and consistency. It is about realizing that you may not be responsible for everything that happens in your life from the outside, but you are responsible for your actions and your thoughts and your feelings, after all they are YOURS. It is about realizing that I am responsible for how I react to situations, I am responsible for how I feel, for how I think. Once you start taking responsibility and accountability for yourself, you tend to notice your attitude changing towards yourself. A bit harsh no? I mean all that responsibility can get a bit overwhelming and sometimes we just want to run away from it all. I know I have. But we can’t live in fear of responsiblity and in victim mode forever. We can’t put our lives on hold forever. We’re here for a purpose. We need to go forward.  I mean at this very moment, I have a major back spasm that has limited my mobility for over a month, but I can’t use it as an excuse to not record, especially since I don’t really need to walk to do it. Your life is like your business and you’re like the CEO. Your business plan consists of your goals and visions for the company. Are you going to navigate it towards growth and prosperity or towards bankruptcy and closure? Are you going to allow a few bad clients to force you to give up? Are you going to fight with all your employees? Are you going to place all your energy and focus constantly thinking about all the ways your company is going to fail and be extremely critical of all its components ? I doubt it. All businesses go through ups and downs, but are you going to shut down your company until things settle or are you going to try and figure it out? I doubt that too because you’re responsible for the business and the jobs you’ve created and you don’t want all that investment of time and money to go to waste. You don’t want to throw away your vision for the company. It is the same with our lives, however, somehow, we don’t apply the same standards to our lives. Well we should. Once we’re able to take responsibility, it is about showing up to those responsiblities every single day, and that’s where consistency comes into place. It is about waking up every morning and being consistent with your words and promises to yourself. (Don’t get me wrong, sometimes it is absolutely impossible to do so, but it is important to remember that even on those days, it is important to try. You may not be able to perform like you usually do, but the intention of trying is all that matters). It’s realizing that regardless of what is happening in my life, I will continue my commitments, not because I have to, but because I want to and I am going to try my best to do so. I want to stay loyal to myself. I want to be the best CEO of my life that I can be. I will go to the gym, I will finish that book, I will continue recording episodes, I will continue giving my energy to my job, I will make the effort to be a conscious and aware co-worker, friend, partner, sibling, parent, daughter. What I am going through is hard and difficult, but I know I can go through it, I know that I won’t let it derail me off my journey and even if it does, I will get back on track because I will show up to my life. I will honour my promises to myself. I will honour my commitment to myself and my life. I know that I cannot control what happens in this life, but I can control how I face it. I can control how I live my life, and I will live It and face it with courage and determination for growth. So Today’s affirmation for me will be “I will show up to my own life with courage” and every time I get nervous or anxious that my life is spiralling out of control, I will just take a deep breath and repeat those words to myself.

Thank you all for listening, Talk to you soon

Love & Light, Tannaz Hosseinpour

Episode 14 -Anxiety

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Hi Everyone,

This is Tannaz Hosseinpour and welcome to Minutes on Growth. I always want my words to come from a place of clarity and true self-reflection hence why it has been a while since I last recorded.  On this episode I want to discuss anxiety, in particular anxiety that is caused by lying.I want to share a very personal story with you. I have a couple of tattoos, and my father who is quiet traditional in this one aspect, never really approved of them. However, I have this one tattoo on my shoulder that I got when i was 15 and have since hid it from him (thats more than a decade) Over time he has seen my other tattoos, so it wasn’t as if he did not know about their presence all together, its just that he did not know about this one. Throughout these years, every single time we would go swimming or on vacations at resorts, I would have to take the extra step to pack a swimming suit that covered it. Or when I would go out with him, to ensure that I wore long sleeves. sometimes even in the summer, and all of this would make me feel anxious. Those close to me were aware of this and would constantly ask me what the difference between this tattoo and the rest are. I never really had an answer, I just felt that it was different and this difference was causing me a lot of anxiety.

This summer my brother was visiting me for about 2 months, and during this time, I traveled for a few days and he remained with my father. When I returned, he came up to me out of the blue and said ” By the way, Dad knows about all your tattoos so you can stop hiding them”. At that moment, hearing those words, I felt this wave of anxiety drowning me. I got super nervous and started rambling about how my father must have been disappointed and worried about how he would react with me. Mind you, I’ve been living alone for almost a decade, I have more own career and life, but at that moment i sounded like the 15 year old girl who had just gotten that tattoo. I remember when I did get it, I ingrained this idea into my head that if my father ever saw it, he would think less of me. So that childhood belief stayed with me, and every time I would think about the tattoo, I would act like the 15 year old Tannaz.

Anyways, as i was panicking, My brother was just staring at me, looking confused and thinking to himself why I was acting like this. He couldn’t understand where i was coming from..and truthfully now that i think of it, i don’t even understand where I was coming from. I had taken this one tattoo on my shoulder and had made it into such a big deal in my own head, and i had lived moments, days feeling anxious when I was in my father’s presence, when all this time he knew about it. The moral of the story is, when you’re lying, hiding a secret or you think you’re hiding a secret, ask yourself, by doing so, does it make you feel anxious? If so, is it worth it? Is the reality of being honest as bad as you think it is? The answers are personal to you, but for me, I just wasted so many days feeling negative and anxious for absolutely no reason. It’s important to every once in a while look into our lives, and re-evaluate the factors that make us feel anxious. Can we do something about them? I am grateful to my brother for doing what he did. It’s interesting to notice how children are more comfortable with being honest and how that impacts their life’s level of ease. As we age, we tend to over complicate things and over-think,  when we really should just take a moment and try to live life like a child with honesty, courage and simplicity.

Thank you for listening and i hope to talk to you all soon,

Love & Light, Tannaz Hosseinpour

Episode 13- Addictions

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Hi everyone,

My name is Tannaz Hosseinpour and welcome to a new episode of Minutes on Growth. I took a break for a couple of weeks to get to the root of my constant battle with sweets, especially with the high risk of diabetes in my family, and the answer surprisingly came to me through a book we were reading for our monthly book club, in fact during a moment when I actually was not even thinking about my sugar addiction. Don Miguel Ruiz in his book The Mastery of Love eloquently writes, ” Sometimes the self-judgment is so strong that people need to be numb just to be with themselves… To avoid being with yourself, you need to take something to numb you, to take your mind away from yourself. Perhaps some alcohol is going to help. Perhaps some drugs. Perhaps eating – eat, eat, eat. ” As I read these words I realized that my inability to control my sugar intake was linked to my relationship with myself. I was frustrated with myself and I wanted to punish myself for placing myself in a certain situation. This cycle seemed familiar …

I am not one to shy away from my past. During my university years, I, a teenager who had just moved away from home, was constantly judging myself for myriad of personal reasons, and I masked my pain with hurtful substances. As I went through therapy, read more books and made some major changes in my life, my need to escape reality lessened. When faced with obstacles, I chose to deal with them consciously and with heightened awareness. However, somewhere along the lines, I lost control and started to seek external comfort. Its strange. I am well-informed about the benefits of a plant based diet and I tend to eat healthy most of the time. However, my struggles with candy, and chocolate have prevented me from achieving optimal health.

Some may argue that chocolate is not as bad as alcohol. But an addiction is an addiction, and too much of anything is harmful.

Even worse, once you have that chocolate bar and see the side effects it has on your body, you tend to judge yourself more and the vicious cycle repeats itself.

This realization has helped me become more conscious of my bad habits. When I find myself opening a chocolate bar or even pouring myself a drink, I ask myself why? Happiness and inner peace is an inside job – so are you trying to run away from your feelings? Are you angry? sad? frustrated or simply bored? I try to be compassionate with myself and push myself to face my feelings, even if I do not know their reasons. While I haven’t been able to completely put aside my bad habits, these steps have helped me limit them and understand their roots better.

I now know that addictions scream denial, scream self-hate and most of all scream self-judgment. The only person who is going to be with us till our last moment is ourselves. We need to be able to live harmoniously alongside ourselves, in full awareness and consciousness without the need for help from external factors . We need to judge ourselves less, and be patient with ourselves as we figure out the root of our problems. These problems didn’t arise overnight, and won’t disappear overnight either. Adding an addiction into the mix will only make matters worse.

On another note, I would highly recommend The Four Agreements and The Mastery of Love by Don Miguel Ruiz. His insights are extremely valuable for our self-growth.

Thank you for listening, talk to you soon.

Love & Light, Tannaz Hosseinpour

Episode 12 – The Importance of Consciously Giving

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Hi everyone,

My name is Tannaz Hosseinpour and welcome to this week’s episode of Minutes on Growth. Last time we spoke about relationships and the importance of respecting our space and energy. This week I want to discuss energy at a universal level. Throughout the years as I’ve fund raised for various organizations, I’ve noticed that some people are hesitant to help causes that do not directly impact them or their communities. I want to take a moment and highlight the concept of collective consciousness. When someone for example in India is suffering either emotionally or physically, all citizens around the world are impacted by it, as that person’s consciousness is part of the universal consciousness. Think of the world as a rug, and every single person being a thread in that carpet. We may not notice it, but sufferings around the world place a heavy toll on universe’s energy, which may have negative consequences both at a micro and macro level.

Knowing this, it is absolutely vital to show compassion, to take care of yourself, of your family, your community and  of strangers worldwide; to use our words and actions as a tool of healing not hurting.

So seek ways to serve others. If you see someone whose emotionally distressed, give them a hug or offer a compassionate ear to listen. If you see someone who is financially struggling, see if you’re able to help them out or try and fund-raise for them. If you see someone who is depressed help them see their talents and how valuable their presence is. If you see someone feeling insecure, share a compliment. Help carry someone’s grocery bag or let them skip the check out line if you sense they’re in a hurry. Use your extra time to volunteer or take out a friend whose been feeling down lately.  Offer a hand to those overwhelmed at work or school. Use your social media to raise awareness for causes you are passionate about. Use your instagram account to inspire not put down. Take a moment out of your day and message your loved ones. Motivate those around you to achieve greatness.

Do something good everyday. and good will return to you. However it is very important to be aware of the intentions behind your actions. It is important to authentically give – to help because you want to , and not because you feel obligated to or feel the need to impress society. If you do it for all the wrong reasons, you will end up feeling depleted and empty instead of full and enriched. Elevate from your core. Realize that these powerful words and actions you’ve chosen to honor have the power to change lives, to make the world into a better place.

We are all in this together.

As Oprah Winfrey quotes ” As Long as we play the us and them game, we won’t evolve as people, as a nation, as a planet.” We’re all on the same team. In fact, we all go through ups and downs so what a wonderful feeling knowing that all the good you do today are stored in the universal bank of karma, and that when you least expect it but need it the most, it can help bring back miracles into your life.

We need to be open to helping others emotionally, physically, spiritually and financially. Together, we can elevate the collective consciousness and restore everyone’s faith in humanity. It is easier to be bad or to be a pessimist. Let us show our strength by choosing to do good and to be optimistic about the people we share this planet with. Today pay it forward. Let us create a domino effect of kindness and compassion.

Thank you for listening, Talk to you soon.

Love & Light, Tannaz Hosseinpour

Episode 11 – Relationships

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Hey everyone,

This is Tannaz hosseinpour and welcome to a new episode of Minutes on Growth. With valentines day right around the corner, I thought it would be fitting to talk about relationships. Prior to my current relationship, I was in an unhealthy relationship for more than 2 years.  Despite him having an abusive temper, I constantly found myself making up excuses for his behavior and trying to rationalize it all. I kept reading relationship books by different authors, ranging from a psychological point of view to a spiritual perspective. I strongly believe that everyone enters our life to teach us a lesson about ourselves and until we learn why, the situation will not change. I knew that my parent’s separation played a major role in my inability to walk away, but i somehow was unable to apply my findings to my situation. So as always i sought the help of my spiritual advisor, and he gave me one of the best advice I have ever received. He said, “Treat your relationship with the same principles you would use at work; it is important to have a list of deal breakers and to hire late and fire quickly” He further explained that at the beginning of a relationship we tend to look past the red flags as we’re so mesmerized with the idea of us two being together. This euphoric feeling of lust, alongside society’s never-ending pressure to be in a relationship, causes us to hire someone quickly into our lives. As time passes by and that initial excitement fades, we start to notice the red flags, but at this moment we’re already feeling the sense of attachment and therefore hesitate in firing them. We end up feeling stuck. We pity ourselves and nag about how unfortunate and unlucky we are that we always end up with the bad ones. But what if we were able to reverse that cycle. To first write down a list of deal breakers or boundaries and actually honor them. To take our time in allowing someone to enter our lives, and once they’re in, to still be aware that if at any moment, those boundaries are broken, you’re able to quickly fire them. Everyone’s list varies. For me it was important for my partner to be extremely kind and philanthropic, to have a great sense of humor and to not be over protective. So when I started dating again, I would immediately pull out my mental checklist. I wanted to protect my energy and space, and I wasn’t willing to sacrifice my peace of mind for temporary companionship, and over time after countless dates I found a partner who fulfilled my checklist and whose checklist I fulfilled. All boundaries are maintained, and we have the utmost respect for one another. Nevertheless, I always tell him that I hope we continue to be in each other’s lives for as long as our souls are in harmony with one another. I have trained myself to let go off everything and everyone that damages my soul’s peace, the same way I would let go of any employee that would damage my business. It’s not easy but it has to be done. So my advice is to treat your space with love and respect, to avoid rash and quick love decisions, and to never silence your gut instinct, regardless of how promising an image can be modeled to look like at first.

I hope your day is filled with endless love today and everyday. Thank you for listening. Talk to you soon.

Love & Light, Tannaz Hosseinpour

 

Episode 10 – Perspective and Positivity

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Hey everyone,

My name is Tannaz Hosseinpour and welcome to this week’s episode of minutes on growth. Last time we spoke about acceptance and love beyond borders, and the need to look past labels for the sake of humanity. This week I want to discuss a more personal and self-related matter.

I’ve been thinking a lot about what it means to be positive and more importantly how to actually be positive. We’ve all heard the statement ” live in the moment” but lets be honest, it is much easier said than done. But over the past few weeks, as a result of  certain events, I realized that the only tool you need to be positive is a loving and calm perspective. Last week, my partner and I were at a cottage with our friends, when i accidentally stuck a knife into my palm. As blood was gushing out of my hand, I noticed that I wasn’t panicking. We quickly put on some ointment and headed to the ER room where I got a few stitches. We were back at the cottage within 2 hours, and continued to smile and party alongside our friends. The next day hot water poured all over me, and once again my body didn’t show a reaction. As we were driving back to town, I thought more deeply about it. Had I shown a negative reaction, allowed my controlling side to come out and panicked, my night would have been ruined. The people around me would have become stressed and the incident would feel worse than it actually was. But because I had shifted away from a fearful and controlling perspective, and handled it calmly, we were able to peacefully and positively pass through it. And that’s life. We can’t control what happens to us, but we can always control our reactions, and it is precisely our reactions that create the state of our lives. The harder we take life, the harder is becomes. The easier and more relaxed our perspective, the easier life flows.

As I shared my insight with my partner, he too decided he would shift his perspective from fear to love and acceptance at work. You may not believe it, but as he changed his choice of words and thoughts, let life just unravel on its own without his need to control every small detail, and stopped panicking and worrying about his current work situation,in a matter of 48 hours, he noticed that deals which he was fearful to pursue because of rejection, kept falling on his lap on their own.

So, I would like you to keep this in mind the next time an unfortunate event occurs or you feel you are panicking or worrying about an event. Take a second and evaluate your reaction and your thoughts. Instead of panicking, How can you make the situation better?and more importantly, how can you step away from fear and into the field of love and acceptance, because everything flourishes with love, and everything is better with acceptance and calmness.

Thank you for listening. Talk to you soon.

Love & Light, Tannaz Hosseinpour

Episode 9 – Acceptance and Love Beyond Borders

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Hey everyone,

My name is Tannaz Hosseinpour and welcome to this week’s episode of minutes on growth. Last time ,we spoke about karma, and how we always reap what we sow, whether its intentional or subconsciously. This week I want to discuss acceptance and love beyond borders. I just got back from a short trip in New Delhi India, where I visited mosques, hindu temples, and sikh temples all in one day. As I glazed into the eyes of the devotees, I sensed a feeling of appreciation and acceptance from them for my love and respect for their religion. As a religion major, I have always been an advocate of accepting and experiencing all religions and beliefs, because I believe that the core of them all is the same; pure love. I also believe that my religion or place of birth does not define me. As Pierre Teilhard de Chardin quotes, We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience. This body of mine and all of its labels are not real – what lies behind it is.

Knowing this, I always make a conscious decision to be inclusive as possible and to love without any borders; to educate myself and celebrate special moments such as Christmas, Easter, Hanukah, Eid & others. I also tend to avoid any nationalistic tendencies because I strongly associate myself as a citizen of the globe. These choices whether conscious or instilled upon by my parents, have allowed me to build stronger and deeper relationship with people from all around the world because ultimately everyone wants to feel accepted and respected.

Experiencing this, I’ve been advocating the demise of labels for the past few years because once you label someone as something, you have immediately created an imaginary wall between you both because now you’re no longer the same … but I recently came to the conclusion that people associate labels with a sense of identity and that not everyone is willing to let that go. This month of December, as we celebrated the Prophet Mohammad’s birthday, Hannukah and prepared for Christmas, I noticed that there’s another way to achieve the goal of complete acceptance, and that’s a shift of perspective from association to Love.

The notion that you connect with the other person based on what is in their heart and not on anything else. You may not get them to rid themselves of their labels, but you can shift your focus on the melody of their soul. Because let’s be frank – We all at some point in our lives may have judged people based on where they’re from, or their religion, and these judgments have impacted our relationships with them. Based on cultural stereotypes, we look down upon certain people or put others on a pedestal. But you’re a good person not because of your religious views, but because of your pure thoughts and actions. You’re a competent person not because of the passport you hold, but because of your capabilities. Don’t forget, that in order for me to feel superior, someone else has to feel inferior. In order for my beliefs to be the right one, someone else’s has to be wrong.

Or even worse, we tend to only care about events and causes that directly impact us. But what we fail to realize is that we are all interconnected. These labels are all man-made. Geographical boundaries have changed over the years. Look at a map from a century ago and compare to a present one. A country’s boundaries have been set by human beings- they’re not set in stone and they’re definitely not strong enough to create a separation.

Let’s not give in to politicians who want us to be divided so they can sell weapons or create wars. Let us unite. Let us build friendships that transcend these man made concepts. Let us stand up, raise awareness and help causes that don’t directly affect us. Because once you do, you realize how interwoven the world is. Let us experience all that life has to offer us through the eyes of love for all ethnicity and religions. Let us not limit ourselves. let us love, respect and take care of all the pure and kind souls out there. The world is a much more beautiful place when you rid yourselves of these man-made cultural stereotypes and break all these imaginary walls.

Thank you for listening, speak to you soon.

Love & Light, Tannaz Hosseinpour

Episode 8 – Karma

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Hi everyone,

This is Tannaz Hosseinpour and welcome to this week’s episode of Minutes on Growth. Last week we discussed self care vs selfishness, how to distinguish between the two and how to take care of your mental and physical health. This week I want to discuss the concept of Karma and taking responsibility for what happens to you – I was fortunate enough to have an article I wrote published on Angels Messenger, where I discuss a story of how after being cyber bullied, an angel card reading and an unexpected guest led me to a more spiritual path at the Kabbalah center. What the story doesn’t mention is that me being cyber bullied wasn’t out of the blue. In grade 9, I unfortunately bullied a much younger child on the school bus and I ended up with a one day suspension, which I thought was the consequence of my actions. However I was wrong, because fast forward 8 years, I was now being the victim of bullying. Now, a lot of times things happen in our life and we say ” Why me? What did I do? I’m so innocent? Why does the universe hate me? ” We fail to see the links. Sometimes its because we are in denial and other times we simply forget our actions because so much time has passed. We fail to see that we are reaping what we sowed years and years ago. But, if we’re able to connect the dots and to step outside our victim zone, we are then able to handle the situation much better, because even if the situation does hurt, we know we brought it upon ourselves so then subconsciously our minds become much more aware of its thoughts and actions. Before we say or do something, we think is it kind, is it nice, is it necessary? Because you want to refrain from spreading any hate or malicious content into the universe – because you know it will come back to you one way or another eventually. In this world, our actions even as a child, regardless of the consciousness behind it, will come back to teach us a lesson. We cannot leave the world the same way we entered it. The karmic cycle teaches us, helps us to grow and helps us to enhance our sense of empathy and compassion, so the next time something happens to you and you feel you’re victimized or how unfortunate it is that you have to face this , ask yourself if you’re picking the fruits of the same tree you planted, and then take responsibility for it. Because ultimately, the universe, energy, god or however you want to name it is fair, and the world spins round and round and so do our actions and thoughts so we need to live more presently, and be more aware and conscious of ourselves and more importantly be responsible for what happens to us. & if you’d like to read my article, then head on over to http://www.angelmessenger.net , under guest posts in the articles section.

Thank you and have a blessed week

Love & Light, Tannaz Hosseinpour

Episode 7- Selfish vs. Self Care

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Hey everyone! My name is Tannaz Hpour and welcome to this week’s episode of Minutes on Growth. A few weeks ago we discussed the importance of maintaining a healthy relationship with yourself – and how vital it is to have self love and respect. I apologize for not posting these past 2 weeks, however as a result of the unfortunate earthquake in Iran, all my attention was directed towards fundraising and raising awareness of the cause, which brings us to this week’s topic of being selfish vs. self care. I knew that my productive hours would be more useful helping out with the cause and that If I had forced my body and mind to over-work, I would be hurting my own health. I wanted my creativity to flow at the right time and on its own pace.

Self care is all about placing yourself first, your mental and physical health as long as it does not hurt someone else. For many years, I was attracting partners with a selfish trait – I did not understand why it kept happening to me; I mean I was always helping out people, and trying my best to be a supportive friend — until one day a wise teacher pointed out that I was extremely selfish – At the age of 17, I had chosen to study in a different country when I knew that my younger brother at home needed me to stay close to him. I had consistently made choices that not only benefited me, but which hurt those closest to me. I was selfish.  I then started to teach myself the importance of keeping into consideration how my choices impacted other people – I wanted to respond to life from a place of empathy. So I jumped to the other end of the spectrum. I said yes to everyone and everything – A few years later, and now this time i had turned into a people pleaser. I became addicted to pleasing others – and somewhere along the way, I had forgotten about myself. But how can I please others, if I can’t please myself? Were my actions out of love or habit?

& that is where balance and awareness comes in. Quoting Meggan Roxanne, self care is acknowledging that you don’t have to be apart of anything that hinders your growth. I’ve created a mental do and don’t list for my mental and physical health which I try my best to follow. Do not force a conversation, a friendship, or a relationship. Do not place yourself in negative situations. Do not engage in gossip. Do not be inauthentic. Do not drink excessively. Do not consume animal products. Do not make mean or judgmental comments to people. Do not label people or situations. Do not rush through life, Take your time. Pamper yourself. Hug and kiss yourself. Be in touch with your true feelings. Express your true feelings in a respectful manner to those around you, whether it is you feeling hurt or happy by something they’ve done or said. Choose friendships that inspire you. Choose a job that sparks your creativity and enlightens your day. Go to places that make you happy. Go on spiritual detoxes. Rid yourself of toxic thoughts. Raise awareness about causes dear to you. Speak to your inner child. Share your passions, gifts and talents with your community. Be of service to those in need. Offer your hand to those in need.

As Oprah says, the biblical verse Learning to love your neighbor as yourself, means you first have got to love yourself. People who truly love themselves, do not spread hate, do not spread violence, or try to inflict harm on others.

So take care of your self – Be protective of your space – Be aware of your thoughts – Filter our the negative ones – Allow yourself to prosper – Allow yourself to be the best version of yourself even if that means saying no at times. Do not hurt yourself. Do not intentionally hurt others. Let your positivity and display of self love and care inspire others.

When you love and take care of yourself, can you love your family, friends, community and  the world you live in. Thank you for listening,

Love & Light, Tannaz Hosseinpour